I’m pretty sure if Sarah needs work done around the house, she should hire someone who has opposable thumbs, rather than rely on me.
It comes up a lot, so I thought I would address it: I am, in fact, a girl dog (though even my grandma thinks I look like a boy, so don’t feel bad if you thought so. It’s a common mistake). Of course, just because I am a girl doesn’t mean I always have to wear pink, contrary to the desires of Sarah. Especially when it’s a pink outfit like this. Which is, as you can see, horrible.
Can’t a dog even get ready around here without Sarah barging in to the bathroom? It appears the answer to that question is, “no.”
As I see it, there are two options here: either I mail myself and my toys somewhere warm and far away from Sarah, or I mail Sarah somewhere cold. Either way, it’s a pretty win-win situation.
No, Sarah, I was not looking for steak in here. Why do you ask?
Yesterday was National Hat Day. Sarah belatedly made me wear this one. No, I am not happy about it.
Today is National Dress Up Your Pet Day. Sarah interpreted the name of the day a bit too strictly.
Sarah dressed me up like this because she wanted to do something fun for my grandma’s birthday, which is today. I have no idea why “something fun” in Sarah’s world needs to involve dressing me up. Anyway, Happy Birthday, Grandma! And when you blow out the candles on your cake, if you could maybe wish for Sarah to stop dressing me up, I would appreciate it.
Here is hoping to a new year involving no clothing for me. Yes, I realize this isn’t going to happen, but in my world, I need this sort of hope to get through days like today, which inexplicably involves a pink sparkly hat.
Choppy the Dog 